Post by Meredith on Aug 25, 2006 21:25:30 GMT -5
A man goes to the minister at his church.
"Reverend," he said, "we
have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep
during your sermons.
It's very embarrassing, not to mention
disrespectful. What can I do?"
"I've noticed this, too. I have an idea if you
are up to the task,"
said the minister. "Take this hat pin with you.
From the pulpit, I
can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will
motion to you.
When I motion, you give her a good poke in the
leg with the hat pin."
At church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed
off.
Noticing this, the minister put his plan to
work. "And who made the
ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to
Mr.Jones.
"Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband
jabbed her in the leg
with the sharp hat pin.
"Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the
ministers quick reply.
Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at
her husband.
Soon Mrs.Jones again nodded off. The minister
noticed. "Who is
your redeemer?" he asked the congregation,
motioning to Mr.Jones.
"My God!' howled Mrs.Jones as she was stuck
again with the pin.
"Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight
grin on his face.
Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a really
hard, threatening glare.
Before long, though, she again nodded off to
sleep. This time,
however, the minister did not notice. As he
picked up the tempo of
his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that
Mr. Jones mistook as
signals to sharply poke his wife with the hat
pin again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to
Adam after she bore
him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted: "You stick
that thing in me just
one more time, and I'll break it in half and
shove it where the
sun don't shine!"
And all the women in the congregation replied
-- "Amen, sister!"
"Reverend," he said, "we
have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep
during your sermons.
It's very embarrassing, not to mention
disrespectful. What can I do?"
"I've noticed this, too. I have an idea if you
are up to the task,"
said the minister. "Take this hat pin with you.
From the pulpit, I
can see when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will
motion to you.
When I motion, you give her a good poke in the
leg with the hat pin."
At church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed
off.
Noticing this, the minister put his plan to
work. "And who made the
ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to
Mr.Jones.
"Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband
jabbed her in the leg
with the sharp hat pin.
"Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the
ministers quick reply.
Mrs. Jones then turned and glared angrily at
her husband.
Soon Mrs.Jones again nodded off. The minister
noticed. "Who is
your redeemer?" he asked the congregation,
motioning to Mr.Jones.
"My God!' howled Mrs.Jones as she was stuck
again with the pin.
"Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight
grin on his face.
Mrs. Jones again gave her husband a really
hard, threatening glare.
Before long, though, she again nodded off to
sleep. This time,
however, the minister did not notice. As he
picked up the tempo of
his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that
Mr. Jones mistook as
signals to sharply poke his wife with the hat
pin again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to
Adam after she bore
him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones jumped up and shouted: "You stick
that thing in me just
one more time, and I'll break it in half and
shove it where the
sun don't shine!"
And all the women in the congregation replied
-- "Amen, sister!"
